Schooled by a preschooler

"I don't want girl to win", said my dejected son sheepishly when I stretched my hand for a high five. This was a few days ago when I and my son had been watching the climax of the movie 'Cars 3' where a dark horse emerged victorious without being succumbed to the wicked act of sledging. Lowering my hand, I sat closer to him, hugged him and said, "It does not matter if it is a boy or a girl. The best one should win". This blog is not about what I preached to my kid though. On the contrary, the subject of my blog is quite the other way round.

Last year I saw drastic changes in my son be it his ability to think and remember or his assertion of independence. I was hit with a hammer on the head by the fact that he was no longer the delicate, helpless baby I brought into this world, but an individual with thoughts and words of his own which were sometimes amusing and at times annoying. The signs began almost as soon as he turned four.

After his fourth birthday, we had planned a visit to my in-laws' place for a family function. On the day of the journey, began his usual questions: "Where are we going?", "Why?", "Why to this grandpa's town and not to the other grandpa's town?", "When will we reach?" and then suddenly I was caught unawares by his remark: "Amma, I know it is very far. See here", throwing his palm up in the air, "I can't catch it!". He had cracked his first PJ or rather a bad joke.

via GIPHY

We were in for many such surprises that year. Some moments brought a great deal of learning and insight on my part which I would like to cherish all my life, which I put forth.

1. Translate beliefs into behaviour

One day he was pretend-playing using his toy blocks.

"Mumma, guess what is this", he showed something that he built.

"Is that an aeroplane?" I guessed as he was into aeroplanes those days.

"It's a fighter plane!", he replied, beaming with pride.

To show an invested observation, I asked about the pilot (a toy block in the shape of a human), "Is he the fighter pilot?"

"No, it's a she. It's a girl pilot", he exclaimed to my astonishment.

Toy plane made of blocks

Probably having seen jets in the sky a couple of times and having seen fighter jets only in pictures in books, this preschooler was unbiased in his knowledge of the role of women in air combat let alone the possibility of women as aircraft pilots. Though I was glad about his broad imagination, I was also embarrassed about my narrow perception having had ideologies of female equality and empowerment. As per the saying, my beliefs should have reflected in my behaviour in this particular case. I realised that it should also be my responsibility to help keep up his open-mindedness regarding women. Now, around seven months after this has happened, when it is hard for him to accept a girl winning a car race as mentioned at the beginning of this blog post I hope he grows up to learn that a four-year-old had once schooled an adult on misconceived notions of gender typecasts in professions and excellence of career-women, in general.

2. Look for opportunity in adversity

It is not an unknown fact that young children have oodles of energy and enthusiasm, and carry lots of positivity and hopefulness. Here is an incident which reminds me that no matter what adverse situation affects us, it is possible to remain positive. Once I tried making mug-cakes as I had come across a simple recipe, on Facebook, requiring only a handful of ingredients and even shorter time. Alas, the end product looked like it could outshine Hagrid's rock cakes in terms of density. I apologised to my highly excited son showing the dug-out piece from the porcelain cup silently blaming myself to have caused the excitement in the first place. To my disbelief, he calmly said, "It's okay. I want to taste it". After having a bite, he giggled and said, "it is not a cupcake, but it is a soft cookie. It's yummy!". He gobbled most of the big "cookie".

"Today me will live in the moment unless it’s unpleasant in which case me will eat a cookie."

– Cookie Monster, Sesame Street

3. Impartiality

I have a small garden in the balcony which I started with the simple purpose of having a couple of kitchen essentials and a few flowers to offer to God. Gradually, this need has outgrown into a sincere interest, and today the balcony looks a little colourful except during a few severe weeks of winter. On a lovely summer morning, I carried my disgruntled son up from his bed and placed him on a stool in the balcony so that he could feel the morning sun and wake up fully to prepare for school. I went back to him after a couple of routine tasks when he uttered benignly, "Amma, these flowers are beautiful. Which one is your favourite?" I smiled and said in all honesty, "I haven't thought about it". Then I sat next to him for a moment admiring each of the plants wondering which one could be my favourite when he surprised me again by asking if I knew which was his favourite. "Do you have a favourite?" I asked back. He replied fervently "all are my favourites". I had learned a lesson in humility.

4. All that you can be

My kid wants to be an astronaut when he grows up. This dream was planted in his mind by his grandfather when he was three years old and nurtured with stories of rockets and outer space. He still believes his grandfather when he tells that he travelled in a spacecraft from his village to Bengaluru, though now he ponders where he might have parked it. As he caught fascination with cars and then race cars, he aspired to become a race car driver at the same time being an astronaut. Today, the list has increased with every episode of the TV series 'Kidz in motion'. With every added profession, he declares that when he grows up, he will be "a race car driver and astronaut and skier and (horse) jockey" and so on. I don't know if he will become even one of these, but it made me think why I can't have more than one profession. Before this realisation, I was just a working mother: a software engineer by profession and everything else was a mere hobby which I would take up when I would not be doing his homework or preparing for an event at school. Now I would like to stretch my wings, try harder and pursue both my hobbies and my job with more vigour.

via GIPHY

Edit: Changed the 'Published' date so that this appears on the top of other posts under this label. Originally published on 04-Feb-2019, 23:16.

The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett - review of a children's classic

                      

"Magic is in me!!" 

These magical words were put forth a century ago by Frances Hodgson Burnett before I had heard about “Universe Conspires” or “Vasudaiva Kutumbakam”.

The Secret Garden is the story of Mary Lennox, a girl with a closed mindset who changes herself in a different environment and helps cure another kid who has blocked the world to himself due to a supposed deformity. The titular garden acts as a catalyst in this journey and is not the only secret that would be uncovered.

Through this novel, Burnett presents the power of the positive influence of human companionship. Having Martha and Dickon in her new life has tremendously favored Mary, the same Mary who was called "the contrary" not long ago in another life in a distant land. They seem to her to be living sufficiently happy lives, on their own terms, without materialistic wealth. Their concern for fellow humans, even animals, manifests in Mary in her approach towards Colin. Nature too plays a complimentary but important role in the emotional growth of the two children. The dried leaves and the flowers of the secret garden bring the promise of pleasant sight and feel with the onset of Spring. Mary is encouraged to care and nurture whereas Colin imbibes the magic of transformation to improve his own physical health.

☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱

"You've been out. You've been out. There's that nice smell of leaves", he cried. She had been running and her hair was loose and blown and she was bright with the air and pink cheeked though he could not see it. "It's beautiful" she said, a little breathless with her speed.

☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱

I listened to the story on Audible’s free collection for kids, which I was checking for my son but ended up reading for myself! Johanna Ward’s splendid narration transports you to England of the 1900s, where and when children were happy to spend time skip-roping and drew mighty pleasures from nature’s abundance. Burnett’s words are enchanting enough to keep you hooked.

                                 

It was surprising to find India and some of its culture being cited in the novel with its mention always invoking curiosity in the characters that resided in Yorkshire where most of the story is set. I liked how a lullaby in “Hindustani” was used to soothe an upset child to sleep. A minor critique here is that India is always mentioned in general, without a single mention of the specific place where Mary had lived, when talking about hot weather or dialects.

The book had turned out a perfect quarantine read and I would happily recommend it to my kid someday. We get to read rarely about walled gardens that open into one another, with wide lawns and winding walks with clipped borders.

The leatherbound Barnes and Noble edition (in the picture) has a beautiful cover and a few illustrations that will not challenge your imagination. It would certainly last longer on your shelf along with adding the luxury. Written text makes referencing easier but to read this book for the first time, I recommend the audio by Johanna Ward.

☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱

And in the grass, under the trees, in the grey urns, the alcoves and here and there, everywhere were touches of splashes of gold and purple and white. And trees were showing pink and snow above his head and there were fluttering of wings and faint, sweet pipes and humming and scents and scents.

☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱🍁🌿☘️🍂🍃🌱

Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg - a mini review

“The phenomenon of capable people being plagued by self-doubt has a name — the imposter syndrome. Both men and women are susceptible to imposter syndrome, but women tend to experience it more intensely and be more limited by it”

And the author has backed these words by at least 6 different articles based on studies or research. She has also mentioned Tina Fey admitting to having had felt like a fraud, quoting from an interview of hers.

I could deeply resonate with these feelings but before reading Lean In I never knew that such a phenomenon even existed!!

Reading this book was like having a colleague friend, a successful one, guide me on how to navigate through a career, or even keep one and be successful. Sheryl Sandberg provides plenty of anecdotes from her own life and from others to qualify what she intends to impart through this book. Be it about corporate life as a jungle gym, or about the required mindset towards mentorship or something as basic as communication, the takeaways are new and valuable. I took away based on desires and current status in life. Plenty of eye-opening data and sound advice on handling maternity and sharing the job of parenting too, with the narrative always engaging and definitely not boring or mundane. So I recommend this book as a must-read for it has something to offer for all readers.

A special mention of the acknowledgment section which shows the amount of effort that went in to make this product. The fact that she reached out to so many people (more than a 100, and a few are acknowledged for just being influencers) for help on this book, and was reciprocated, only indicates her will and desire to help others in the best way possible. It’s astounding and highly admirable.

What prompted me to write about this book is that amidst all that she has written about her lessons and achievements (with high energy and enthusiasm), she comes across as a genuine person and that’s why I mention her as a “friend” at the beginning of this post.

Animal Farm - book review

Seldom, works of literature compel you to look up further on the subjects in which they delve. I have no qualms on spending additional time to explore the themes in this novel, about the author and the reception for this exceptional piece of fiction. Here is an attempt at reviewing Animal Farm, by George Orwell, that featured in Time's All-Time 100 Best English-language novels, won a retrospective Hugo award and recently featured in World Economic Forum book club members' seven favorite reads for quarantine.

My take on the narration:

• A short read (150 pages in the pocket-sized edition), but a heavy one. Simple, clear, purposeful and effective. Some of the allegories are easy on the brain. For instance, who cannot relate the word "comrades" to a group of communists? Most chapters begin with a gist of the remainder of the chapter so although answers to our "what happens next" questions are known, what seems to be more interesting are answers to "how" and "why". Though the sentences or words were simple and direct, the prose is always engaging.

Quote:

"During the next three months there was much secret activity. Major's speech had given to the more intelligent animals on the farm a completely new outlook on life. They did not know when the Rebellion predicted by Major would take place, they had no reason for thinking that it would be within their own lifetime, but they saw clearly that it was their duty to prepare for it."

• Orwell formed six rules for effective writing. While I looked out for these when reading, one that is clearly reflected is:
• Never use a long word where a short one will do.
• I started at a slow pace admiring the narration which was concise yet descriptive at times. In the beginning, the backdrop is set with great detail - the farm and all its elements, the countryside, the humans. It was heartening to find a full-length song 'Beasts of England' written and its tune described so I sang the first few stanzas in my mind in one of the tunes mentioned. In the context of this song, one cannot ignore the genius of the author that he composes this song - created for a purpose that is pure - technically better than the other songs/poems in the book. The story picks up the pace gradually and does not slow down for a hopeful twist at the beginning turns into disturbing, gory and eventually, doom.

My take on the theme/purpose:

• Before reading the book, I did not know about Russian politics and the Soviet rebellion which serves as a basis for this satire but took gradual interest while reading the book. The divide in the factions (white and red) is depicted through the two central characters Snowball and Napolean.

Quote:

"It had come to be accepted that the pigs, who were manifestly cleverer than the other animals, should decide all questions of farm policy, though their decisions had to be ratified by a majority vote. This arrangement would have worked well enough if it had not been for the disputes between Snowball and Napolean. These two disagreed at every point where disagreement was possible."

• More than mirroring one particular country, Orwell has shown the transition of a new free state (in this case, free from slavery) from a communist implementation to a totalitarian regime. Two of the seven commandments formed initially are the ideal beliefs of humans, but not always followed by us:
• No animal shall kill any other animal
• All animals are equal
• What makes the climax appalling is the level of greed that caused the state of affairs and yet the climax is convincing for we now know that it is greed that causes one to do the worst. There could be a Napolean within each of us. Be on the lookout within you and around you.
• Boxer is a character that can come across as someone who cannot exist in today's world. Surprisingly, there was a real-life model in the Soviet Union whose hard work and loyalty was made example of and therefore, could have served as an inspiration for this character. In my case, as I noticed people around me on the days that followed after completing the book (finished the second half in a couple of hours), I could see those to whom you could attribute the virtue of unconditional loyalty and I can only wish and hope that one's loyalty does not lead to his/her end.

Quote:

"He repeated a number of times, "Tactics, comrades, tactics!" skipping round and whisking his tail with a merry laugh. The animals were not certain what the word meant, but Squealer spoke so persuasively, and the three dogs who happened to be with him growled so threateningly, that they accepted his explanation without further questions"

This book drove me into contemplation for days. Hoping that the review enables you to pick up the book and read. If you have read it, let me know what you think of this review, in comments.

English August - a mini review

A worn out book only indicates its popularity. Feeling proud that I read a book from my long-pending to-read list and the book has not disappointed me.

When I was reading this novel, I too was changing jobs so I could relate to the absurdity that the protagonist felt in his first job. His restlessness about the absurdity beautifully expressed in some of the lines like this one:
“Movement without purpose, an endless ebb and flow, from one world to another, journeys and passages, undertaken by cocoons not for rest or solace, but for ephemerals”.

Much of the narration is as graceful though a tad bit slow. It was amazing to read about the India of late 80s and to realise that not much has changed since except for the technological invasions. The exchange of letters feels nostalgic. An itsy bitsy complaint about not mentioning the Hindi songs in Hindi but as translations. Makes one think that the book was intended for the English (Anglo) readers, what with one of the quotes in the book asserting the Bengalis’ fascination for English!

I thoroughly enjoyed reading English August. Ending with another lovely paragraph end from the book:
“At night he would lie awake and hear the clack of his uncle’s typewriter and watch the dark shape of the bougainvillaea outside the window, and see in its twists and turns a million things, but never his future”.

Lepakshi - a photo blog

Built about five centuries ago, the temple and shrines in Lepakshi, a town in Andhra Pradesh, not very far from Bengaluru, are known for several architectural aspects. Presenting a few of them in pictures.

 

 

The ceilings of the interiors of the temple, the mukha mantapa and the arda mantapa, are adorned by several frescoes. The one in the antechamber is Asia's largest, measuring 23 by 13 feet. Photographed the frescoes in the outer hall.

Ubiquitously present are the carved stone pillars to satiate one's appetite for visual art.

The temple complex is vast, as can be gauged from the above pictures. There is a lot of open space too.

Outside the complex 200m away guards the monolith of Nandi, said to be Asia's largest.

Finally, a few more random pictures of stone carvings. I'm not including the picture of the hanging pillar (you read it right) here as a photo may not be able to do justice to its architectural aspect.

on a pillar

on the ceiling

on the steps

large meal-plate carved on the floor

Introduction to the world of Katha publishing - how stories improve lives

StoryPedagogy, the concept of teaching through stories, was introduced by Geeta Dharmarajan, founder-director of Katha, an NGO that also publishes children's literature. The concept works through these two books that we bought and read recently. Presenting the mini-reviews:

Run Ranga Run: A story of a female rhinoceros growing from a baby who needs to be nudged to stand on her feet to a confident young adult who stands for her mother in danger, is delivered gracefully. The succinct first person narration and the soothing colours used for illustration makes for an endearing bed-time story. My almost-6yr old learnt figurative phrases like “a river full of stars”.                         

                                 

At the end, after reading about some facts about rhinos, we added Khaziranga to our must-visit places. He had a ripple of laughter when I read out, “We talk a lot! We also use our poop to talk with other rhinos!” Later, when he remembered this sentence with a sense of intrigue, I had a tough time making him understand the possible situations in which rhinos used poop to talk and why humans couldn’t or shouldn’t. Though the target age group is not clear, I believe this book could serve as a read-alone to a more mature group.

Hic!copotamus: This one’s a fun read, about a hippo landing from Africa to India after a heavy hiccup! Apart from learning surprising facts about Hippopotamuses like their ability to remain under water for really long, we also learn how team work can solve problems in an absolutely entertaining way, presented with a host of characters and multitude of eye-catching pictures. This is a recommended read for pre-schoolers.

                                     

This is the first time I have learnt about the publishers. I noticed the Indian name in the book sale that takes place during my kid’s PTM at his school. From its conceptualisation of making “reading for fun”, to “reading for meaning”, Katha has done a wonderful job at improving lives of slum dwellers, who learn by way of stories at the Katha schools. This is a story about helping the underpriviledged. A story of mighty dreams and achievements. An inspirational one.